‘Outermost Me’

They look and see
The quiet surface of me,
Slight waves of personality.

They don’t know what I hide
How strong my tide.
The depth of my sea..
They simply cannot see.

They will never be able
to swim to my depths,
or reach my upmost steps.
They could not stay afloat
In the midst of these mental waves.
The able thoughts that swim in my head
Will shepard uncertainties, creating envious reds.

So I downplay the strength of my current,
And lessen the significance of my existence.
I understate my greatness,
Discredit my skill
I sacrifice myself,
Eat my ego away

I take form as a puddle…
and reflect infinity.

-E. Solouki
Originally written January 2016

 

(something about others (or yourself) never being able to uncover the depth of your personal being. like the red flower you clicked on to get to this writing, it attracted us, it’s beautiful, but is it ever possible to actually know the flower?  the complete construction of the mechanisms for its biology? This also depicts the paradox of feeling so highly of yourself but at the same time feeling worthless, am I afraid of my own strength?)